I’m writing this issue of GNM during the Ides of March. Let’s just say I’m watching my back.
I’m watching my front, too, because tonight I plan on watching the Ryan Gosling/George Clooney political thriller Ides of March. The film centers around Gosling, a super-hot and smart campaign staffer running the show for George Clooney’s presidential bid.
There’s plenty of hot guy treachery and metaphorical backstabbing afoot as the film is a clear allegory for the fall of Julius Caesar, only with Clooney in his peak silver-fox era and Gosling when he was still pretty thin, but you could tell he had the potential to be so buff if he wanted to.
Modern politics dropped the ball when it comes to putting hot guys in the Oval Office. They’re good at casting hot guys to play POTUS in a movie, but art rarely imitates life when we have to look at uggos like Taft, Buchanan, and Nixon.
John F. Kennedy set the standard for hot presidents. Most movie presidents try to emulate his swagger and sexual energy, but few, if any, have captured it.
Only Morgan Freeman in Deep Impact came close to encapsulating the JFK mystique. But then an asteroid slammed into the ocean, creating a tsunami, and Elijah Wood had to marry this homely girl.
Her parents were too lazy to run from the tsunami, and they gave Elijah their homely baby to raise. Then Elijah had to drag the homely girl and homely baby up a mountain so they wouldn’t drown. It was a mess.
But I’m drifting off-topic.
Hot guy presidents are something I think about a lot, but I’m aware I tend to ruminate on things many people don’t give a second thought to.
Other topics that fill up my brain are Rory McIlroy’s intimate relationship with his caddie, Harry Diamond, the YouTube video where a kid calls the lead singer of Sugar Ray Sugar Gay, David Hasselhoff’s thoughts on the Vietnam War, and keeping my eyes peeled for real-life examples of topics I cover in my newsletter.
Just last week, I wrote about my mother’s philosophy of giving your problems to the universe.
If something unexpected and unwelcome arises, instead of fighting it, fall and have faith that the universe will catch you. It’s a simple concept, but it’s only words until I have proof that it works.
Well, have I got some proof for you.
I had an issue at my school that threatened my certification at the end of this year. At first, I was defiant.
They wanted me to take some dumb course that would take 55 dumb hours to complete, and while I could carve out the time between weightlifting and writing eulogies for the cast of Saved By The Bell, I didn’t want to do it. It sounded like a p in my a, so I blew it off.
How dare they force this course upon me? Don’t I have enough on my plate? I just joined a new gym. I have to ensure my students don’t butcher me like Julius Caesar. My truck needs an oil change. My cat had a fever. The list of reasons I couldn’t do it went on and on because I didn’t want to do it.
Then, I took my mother’s advice and gave it to the universe. I stopped fretting about this dumb course that might keep me from being certified and let the universe solve the problem for me.
I sat back, and, long story short, I got a phone call saying all was good. While I still have to take the course, I have five months to do it, and I will be certified at the end of the year after all. I did nothing, yet the problem worked itself out.
I know my example sounds like small potatoes, and we like to have fun here at GNM, but sometimes, the things I write are more than just tomfoolery. I feel it my duty to share real-life examples of the concepts we explore together.
I know someone who needs to hear this. She got some unsettling news, and while the situation is manageable, it’s not ideal. She’s handling it remarkably well, but as the road gets longer, it’s possible she gets in her head and makes things worse physically, mentally, and spiritually.
To her, I say close your eyes, cross your arms over your chest, and fall backward into the inky warmth of the welcoming universe. We aren’t equipped to handle all of this existence at once. If we try, we can drive ourselves bonkers.
That’s why, as I remember hearing in school, God never gives us more than we can handle. I thought that meant that we’d only have to deal with enough to keep us relatively sane, but I realize now that life throws everything at us all at once, and the universe will handle most of it if we let it.
Hang in there, give your worries away, and instead of being wary, welcome the Ides of March.
Until next time.